Managing the Holiday Blues: How to Protect Your Heart This Holiday Season
The holidays are a time of hustle and bustle, of consumerism, and high expectations. Stressors abound, whether it in the form of wondering how to pay for Christmas presents in addition to the bills, missing a loved one during the holidays, feeling stress or grief about a family fracture, or reflecting on a difficult year, the holidays can feel like a time of celebration, but can also bring in some struggle and overwhelm.
It can also be a time of reflection, of gratitude, of togetherness, and of letting your guard down just a little bit at work or school to take a much-needed break. Here are some ways to cultivate joy amidst the chaos this holiday season.
Keep it Simple: I’d like to challeng you to downgrade your gift exchange this year. Propose a white elephant, secret santa, an experience instead of presents, or handmade gifts. Instead of feeling like you need to give a gift to every single person in your extended family, this could be a good alternative. After all, if we are all feeling the pressure, maybe we should zoom out a little bit and let the materialism GO.
Make a Plan: What is needed to help manage holiday overwhelm? Do you need to order gifts instead of going out to buy them? Say no to that extra party or cocktail, or come up with an exit strategy if you decide to attend? Take inventory of how to keep yourself healthy (both energetically and physically) this holiday season.
Gratitude: It’s so easy to get swept up in the noise! When we are able to look around and take stock of the good stuff, the rest falls away. Let me share a personal story about this: I’m on vacation, and my daughter got sick. I’ve had moments of guilt, frustration, sadness and regret. Questions such as “why did we choose to travel?”
Feelings of disappointment that we came so far just to sit in a hotel room, frustration with my partner and myself as we navigate challenging situations that honestly just happen. But then I look over at her sleeping and I think, she is SO perfect. She is getting well, and we are okay. I have a partner who is my teammate, and we are capable of helping her while she is getting well. We are OK. When I look at what we do have, it makes that hard stuff so much more manageable.
Service: Okay, so maybe at the moment you don’t have the money for vacation at all, or you feel discouraged and set back. Or maybe like us all you feel like maybe you are taking two steps forward, and one step back, or even one step forward and two steps back. Here is a strategy that can help regardless of your situation. Giving.
We can give in many ways, (money, time, acts of service, or an encouraging word). It might be financial (contributing to a charity of your choice), giving to a local food pantry, sorting cans, meals, or other resources for those in need, or serving meals for those struggling with being unhoused.
When I give of myself in service (when balanced with self-care), it is almost impossible to suffer. The reasons are that it helps me to reflect in gratitude for the blessings in my life, it helps me feel meaning and purpose, and it helps me feel a sense of connection to others.
Finally…
Connect to Unfettered Joy: Take in an astounding view, have a meal that engages your senses deeply, have a luxurious bath, listen to your favorite song on repeat or with mindful attention, journal to let go of grief. Dance, sing, be silly, let go, and let the pieces fall where they may. Read that book you have wanted to read.
You have the rest of your life to hold on tightly, so maybe just let go, and let what is fill your heart with acceptance, peace and joy.
If you need some support to get there, or you need a healthy place to cry, find meaning, gain support, or find your voice, counseling can help. Feel free to reach out and we are here for you! www.counselnature.com
