There is a moment—brief, but powerful—that exists between what happens to us and how we respond. Viktor Frankl, a psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, described this space with wisdom that resonates across time:
"Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom."
This space may be imperceptible at first, buried under years of habit, conditioning, or survival instincts. But it is always there. And within it, we find our greatest power—the power to choose.
The Power of the Pause
Much of life feels automatic. Someone cuts us off in traffic, and anger flares. A harsh word from a loved one, and we snap back. A stressful day, and we reach for something to numb the discomfort. These responses may feel inevitable, but they are not. They are patterns. And patterns can be changed.
What if we learned to pause in that space? What if, instead of reacting, we took a breath and observed?
This is the foundation of mindfulness—the ability to witness our thoughts, emotions, and sensations without being consumed by them. It’s the skill that allows us to shift from reaction to intention, from impulse to wisdom.
How Trauma Shrinks the Space
For those who have experienced trauma, that space can feel almost nonexistent. The nervous system, trained by past pain, learns to react quickly to perceived threats. A raised voice may trigger a fight-or-flight response. A sense of abandonment may lead to shutting down. These are survival responses, not conscious choices.
But even for those carrying deep wounds, the space still exists. It may take time, self-compassion, and healing work to find it—but it is there. Somatic therapy, mindfulness practices, and self-compassion techniques can all help widen that gap, allowing for new, healthier responses to emerge.
Reclaiming Growth and Freedom
Each time we pause before reacting, we reclaim a bit of ourselves. We create the possibility of responding from our values rather than our wounds. We choose patience over frustration, curiosity over defensiveness, and self-compassion over self-judgment.
This space between stimulus and response is where growth happens. It’s where we rewrite old narratives and step into a more empowered way of being. It’s where we free ourselves—not from pain, but from the automatic patterns that keep us stuck in it.
So today, notice the space. However small, however fleeting—breathe into it. That breath is your power. That breath is your freedom.
